'Rodentz' Review | shameface.com

Rodentz, also known as Altered Species, has the dubious distinction of being one of the worst low-budget horror films of the last decade. There's nothing wrong with the concept of killer rats, but the movie falls flat in just about every area of execution. The acting sucks, the directing sucks, the guy in the big rat suit sucks, the effects suck, the music sucks, even the DVD Case art suck."Hide the cheese" says the front. "Classic creature feature" says the back". "This looks bad" says Mike. "I agree. Let's get it." says I. And that's how we stumbled across this rat's rear end of a film.

Before I start ripping on Rodentz itself, let me say one more thing about the DVD Case. In the bottom left corner there is a graphic that says "Formatted from it's original version to fit your TV set". Just below this is a depiction of what the full-frame video looks like on both a standard 4:3 television and also a widescreen 16:9 television. Just below that is the phrase "Presented in its original aspect ratio of 1.33:1". Now, "Formatted from it's original version" and "Presented in its original aspect ratio" don't really work together, so it's safe to say there wasn't a whole lot of proofreading of the case.....or the script for that matter.

The worst thing about Rodentz really is the tediously slow pace of the movie. The first forty minutes or so are spent setting up the plot and characters, and as far as I can remember only seven people ever show up. As is the case with any horror film, several of these aren't really important to the movie: they only exist so we can watch them die. Most of the main characters also die due to bad luck, betrayl, and just plain stupidity.

One sign of a truly bad movie is complete indifference to the plight of the characters. A few minutes into Rodentz, I not only felt indifferent to the characters, I actually wanted them dead. This movie is so bad that this morbid fantasy does, at times, carry over into the realm of reality. You may find yourself thinking "Nobody involved with this cinematic embodiment of human excrement should be allowed to live."

There's a lot that doesn't make sense in this film. Take, for instance, one of the unimportant female characters in this film. When we first meet her, she's wearing tight blue jeans and a pink top. As the movie progresses, her jeans magically descend. In every new scene, the jeans are a little lower, revealing more and more of her lacy black underwear. You could make the argument that the jeans simply fell on their own, but that doesn't seem likely as they're skin-tight. The only explanation we can think of was that the actress was told to lower her pants every couple of minutes to keep people watching. Her top also comes off just before she die, but even this doesn't redeem the movie at all.

The only thing that even comes close to being good in this movie is the drunken janitor. His role in the movie goes something like this: Scientist: "We sure don't make your life easy do we?"
Janitor: "Whiskey and a soft bosom make my life easy."
Janitor moves to basement, finds dead cat, is killed by rats.
Those couple of seconds are probably the best of the movie. Yes, it really is that bad.

The effects consist mostly of low-budget 1996 era CGI. Animation and textures are terrible. There's also an infrared filter thrown in to simulate the rats' vision, and a giant rat that walks upright. That last one is a guy in a cheaply made rat suit. Why that particular rat is huge and walks upright is never explained. The rest of the rats are just your pet-store variety. Small, cute, and not very menacing at all. Actors are covered in a few dozen of them, and pretend the things are eating them alive. Very unconvincing.

All in all, Rodentz is an intellectual Auschwitz; a movie so bad that its effect on your IQ should be considered a war crime. There is no reason to buy, rent, steal, or download this film. Our final grade, and we feel we're being generous here:

Stats & Info
Rating: Rated R for violence/gore and some sexuality.
Rarity: Common
Genre: Horror/Sci-Fi
Released: 2001
Country of Origin: USA
Video: Color; Fullscreen (1.33:1)
Audio: Engish (Stereo)
Subtitles: Spanish
Plot: Lab rats injected with toxic material become fury little killing machines.
How Bad Is It? - Everything about it sucks. EVERYTHING.